What I Did On My Thanksgiving Vacation!

I didn't have a Thanksgiving vacation.. this would be because I am not in school. However, Seattle did have a magical time!

So, lets see Monday the 22nd. I was at home and this happened!

That was at 11 AM.

I then, settled down to watch " The Audition" it is good watchin' on a day like this!

This was at 1:30 PM

I then told my Step Dad type human that he should probably come home because it was coming down pretty fierce and we needed to get supplies.

Smows and S'moes mmmmmmmmmm

I was settling down to some delightful soup and tea and s'moes and outside looked like this.

At around 9:30 I got a call from The Matt!" Hi, We need you to work tomorrow morning!" " Well, Shit :(  " I was promised a room, I was then on my way to catch the 10PM bus to see if I could get to work before everything was totally smowed up. My mom spent 4:30 hrs. in the car trying to get home. 

Here is what it looked like in my neighborhood at 10 PM

oooo smowsingsly

Do you want to watch a video of me on the bus? It is really cool!

I need to be better at filming.. oh well. Still, you get the idea!

I get to work and check in.. and look at what Downtown looked like!

So then I worked. It was crazy pants, everyone loses their shit. It is retarded. I wrote a bitchy blog post.

Here is my triumphant return back to my house! 

I am super proud of myself. I didn't slip, fall, eat shit and die, break anything or get cold! WOOT!

So then, the next day... I got ready and trudged back out in the cold to see Jenny. I had to work on Thanksgiving and she felt unloved. We had a slumber party.

The #75 bus is not going to stop here, go catch it the Bartell's 

Jenny is super "excited" about the weather

We watched ValleyGirl.. The girl in it talks with her teeth out like a horse, this is Jenny's horse face.

Jenny Painted My Toes! 

The next morning Jenny went to yoga and I got a latte and hung out with her cat. Then I made breakfast for Jenny and Matt Kane. Then I went to work and....

WATCHED A CHARLIE BROWN THANKSGIVING!!!

I passed it around to pretty much every department that would take it. I then went home and slept really late and then didn't really leave my bed for most of the day. THE END!

Gearing up for the smows blog post with linkages!

Tomorrow.. maybe tonight I will loading up an epic," What I did on my Thanksgiving Vacation" style post about what happens when Seattle gets Satan's butt dander all over us. Until then, here are some links!

This is something that I might try to install when I have a house of my own. It will be only on doors into rooms that are common like offices, living rooms, what have you. Maybe my toddlers room, with the option of removing it when they are older because I would be a cool parent.

Good Job, French Farmer! Way to feed your ducks pot!

Can you name all 77?

So.. uh.. really? You are afraid that girls are going to arrange their own clandestine marriages? So, now they can't use cell phones?!

COOLEST BIKE LOCK EVERS!! I know you don't know German.. but just watch it.

*sigh* How many people who are gay will stop using iPhones because of this? None.. oh well!

Have you ever wanted to know how to disarm a nuclear bomb? Well here you go!

People are just lazy, so it is easier to do what is lazy.

Who wants to move to the moon? oh wait, not the moon.. A moon around Saturn!

Cool wooden scooter thinger, is an important thinger in the Congo.

I hope these little guys weren't harmed by these really tiny pies!

BEST ANNIVERSARY PRESENT EVERS!

So.. I would be Atari, Nintendo 64, Nintendo 64, Earthworm Jim!

I am thankful for you ( person I work with on Thanksgiving)

I have to work on Thanksgiving. This upsets people that I love. I don't get to hang out with my parents. None of them.. none of the 4 sets of parents do I get to hang out with. I do not get to hang out with my friends. None of them, I was invited to like 4 things tonight. I don't get to go to any of them. LAMES!

Oh well here are somethings that I am thankful for.
First off, the trailer for THANKSGIVING by Eli Roth. I like the comments on this.. my favorite, " WOOHOO TITTIES ON YOUTUBE!"



I am thankful for this picture of a murdering baby!

I am thankful for TURKEYZILLA!


I am thankful for TurDuckIns. I will making one of these some day.


I am thankful that Kobayashi will eat an entire turkey.


I am thankful for William S. Boroughs


I am thankful for RocketBoom and all of their zany antics, including this nifty thing where it is a "Living Photo" then you click on the person in the photo and you watch them make a side for Thanksgiving!


I am thankful for, interesting things to do with your stuffing.. besides shoving it up your best friends rectum. :D

I am thankful for this clip from one of my favorite movies.


I am thankful for this post from DeadSpin, most because of the title of the post.. and the FIRES!


I am thankful for this handy chart on how to eat people.. :D

I am thankful for Little Eva


I am thankful for pretentious ways to cook a piece of turkey.

I am thankful for the Dead Milk Men


I am thankful for Thanksgiving Drinking Games!

Turkey for me and Turkey for you! I like to eat Turkey in my big brown shoes!


I am thankful for you!

Whining about people, who whine about people, who whine about how Seattle deals with snow.

I have lived in Seattle most of my life. I am pretty sure that when I tell people.. no really Seattle doesn't really get much snow in the winter... that I am right. I know that for the last 5 years.. there has been several occurrences of "SMOWS". However, in general, since Seattle has been a place where people document weather.. we usually don't get snow in the winter.

With that being said, when people who have moved here from places that get snow during the winter, see the snow in Seattle.. they say, " No big deal, I had to deal with FFFFAAAAAAARRRRRRRR WOOOOORRRRRSSSSSEEEEEEE than this in ( Name the place that has snow in the winter). Why is this a big deal? You should salt and plow.

Then, people who have lived in Seattle for a long time go.. well, we do. However, we do not have the ability to salt and plow 24 hrs a day.. and when we do salt.. it just melts the snow then the snow refreezes into sheets of ice.

The person from places who sees snow every winter, then say, well, you are all asshole retarded fuckwits. ( Not Helpful Kids)

I am not very sure that people understand that the reason why we are not prepared for snow is that.. WE DON'T USUALLY GET SNOW IN THE WINTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

The reason why places like Chicago, Washington D.C., Montreal, New York, Utah, Canada, Colorado, Iceland, Antarctica, The Andes, Nepal.. Do not have an issue with this is a) THEY GET SNOW IN THE WINTER! b) Because you get snow in the winter, your state has put forth years and years of money into the infrastructure one needs to constantly have salters, deicers, plowers, sanders, whatthefuckeversers. c) You learned how to drive in snow.. with actual practice, we however did not because we don't get snow during the winter.

So unless you all have several millions of dollars sitting in your bank account and the ability to make snow coping machines out of your rectum. SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! Enjoy, that you get to stay home and drink hot cocoa. 

I want people who are not from Seattle.. to read  EVERY PART OF THE ARTICLES ON THIS SITE ABOUT SNOW IN SEATTLE!

Ok, I am done being grumpy. <3 Anne

My manager is dreamy! Unfortunately.... we both don't swing that way.

The one manager at my job that I can stand, is pretty amazing. I am pretty sure that he could actually be considered a friend. Which is crazy since most managers aren't very friendly, but he is. It also helps that he is the same age as my old brother, likes all of the nerdy things I like and is catty. I wrote about him once before, he got vajazzaloped. I walk into work the other day.. and he was like, "pssst, come here, I have a present for you." Then some other employee walked in the room and there was a moment of " we must not let this person know our secret" which then faded into " oh, fuck it, I drew you a doodle."

LOOK AT HOW EPIC THIS DOODLE IS!

So yea, pretty amazingly epic. And a true story. 

I spent most of the day yesterday thinking about, dreading, kind of being excited about SMOWS! ( that is what I am calling snow this year.) Seattle is currently under like 2 in. which is like a big fucking deal. My mom's cats are being neurotic and my hedgie is being grumpy and huffly. 

This article upsets me. I have been told by people who have had children that I am being a big juvenile baby about it, I don't care. Breast Milk Cocktails are creepy. I am not letting my hubs anywhere near my sweater cows while I am breast feeding. I do not care.

In Canada they are trying to shame men into not being rapists. I am not sure how that works.. I mean.. yes, you could probably stop guys from taking advantage of drunk girls. However, hardcore rapists.. they are going to rape. * side bar* CHARLOTTE KING REPORTED THE RAPE AND IDENTIFIED THE RAPIST!! YAY!!!

Pinball Wizard!

I am not too sure about this. It is either amazingly campy and great, or just German and slightly homophobic.

In Scotland.. journalism is harsh. They straight call a spade a spade.. or well a child molester a monster.

YOU ARE A DOCTOR! YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO EAT AN ARTICHOKE!

ARACHNID!


Don't worry about cancer.. these underpants will save you from getting when you go through the pornoscanner.

I need to have one of these. JENGA CHEAT GUN!

The Importance of Being Mediocre

For most people who know me intimately and if not intimately then at least well enough to know me well enough, I have spent my life trying to achieve mediocrity. I did the bare minimum in life to get by, so that I could do what I liked. When I had my yearly review at my job and I was given a 3/5 on everything, it was like they were giving me 5/5 with gold stars! Why would anyone want to me mediocre?? Well, I don't like pressure and I feel that if I under promise and then luck into over delivering people think that I am neat. I am also lazy, but mostly, I know that I will never be perfect, so why try? It just makes you a cranky asshole when you fall on your face.

When you decide to walk up an unmoving escalator.. make sure that it is ok to do so. Because you know.. it might be like DANGEROUS!

ALL TURKEYS MUST DIES!!!

hehehehehe Spudnik hehehehehehehehe!

The pope loooooooovvvvvveeeessss condoms!

Glenn Beck is gay? Why 4chan wants you to not have a kid, baby dinosaurs and what I want to be when I am an old lady!

Morning Hepcats and Kittens!

I think that Glenn Beck doesn't understand that when you have two men on the cover of a book with a kid.. the way not to look like moparents is to not have one picking up the kid and having a face snuggle while the other one is looking on proudly. 

For someone who is trying really hard to break that closeted homosexual vibe.. Glenn Beck is a failin'.

These people should have an abortion.. because they don't deserve to have children if they are going to put an online poll up asking if they should have an abortion. Also, you are idiots for not knowing the interwebs will 4chan your ass if you post something like that. REALLY!??!?!?!! /b/tards will do anything having to do with dead babies.

Worst Bridesmaids Ever! Best No Longer Bride Ever!  :(

It makes me want to have two pets.. and name them Bouba and Kiki!

ZOMG!!!! FACEBOOK IS RUINING MARRIAGES!!!!!!! Which is funny.. since one of the only reason why my marriage is working out rather well is that I have a long standing Sunday morning date with my husband to play Scrabble on Facebook while we are on Skype.

So.. super sad Nobel Prize News. They are unable to fully award the candidate for the peace prize because China is dildos!

BABY!  DINOSAURS!

When I am a Gran.. I will be a SUPER GRAN!

uh.....

So, I was browsing stuff.. and I just wanted you to look at this!

Hipsterbonics and Hugging Babies

I have been not around the interwebs for a while because my "sister" had a baby. I say "sister" because being someone who was raised by wolves, I consider someone who's house I had a majority of meals and hours sleeping at to be family.

Their parents are my parents and they are my siblings. I also adopt their siblings as my own and their eventual children to be my nieces and nephews. So, yea, I went down to Olympia and hung out with my "siblings" and held my new baby "niece" and played the fall down game with my "nephew". There was huge windstorm, we lost power. I was supposed to leave at 1PM yesterday, however I left my wallet at my sister's house so they wouldn't let me on the bus.. so then I chilled until the 6 PM bus. I love babies! I also love toddlers, but not in that creepy self publishing and selling on Amazon way.

I learned a whole new form a speaking over those two days.. and by learned I mean.. I came up with a name for how my younger "sister" talks. She is in her late teens/ early twenties. She lives in a Punk/Hippie/Anarchist/Hipster shared garage/loft/apartment/house/yurt thinger. She doesn't shower much, has tattoos that are artsy/random and two nose piercings. I love her dearly. She is one of my favorite people.. however.. She is CrayCrayKins. She "makes kisses" with guys, when walking down the street she randomly says," Is that Mine?!" in regards to whether or not a person is someone she knows. People are randomly jerks... and she refers to herself in the third person with her first and last name. I find myself after talking to her for a couple of hours.. talking like her. Which, is at the time totally amusing but afterwords when I am back with people who are not used to this particular dialect, I get looked at funny.

This also, however, has made me aware that I also talk in a strange Buffyesque manner. I also, say what I consider catchphrases.. that could possibly considered the hipsterbonics of my generation. I believe that a lot of my speech is comprised of interwebs mems, bastardized urban speak and a belief that everyone I have ever known watches anime/plays video games/is a trekkie/uses the force. An of examples of a conversation I  had recently.

Husband: ok

  I have no idea where I will be today

 me: That is why Dinosaur Jesus invented cell phones and text plans!

I love that I have friends that get the joke of when they are " paging Dr. House" to help figure out why they are sick

they think I am brilliant that I suggest Sarcoidosis or Lupus

See! I refer to Dinosaur Jesus.. who refers to Dinosaur Jesus!? I do apparently. Look! I refer to being brilliant for making a simple pop culture reference.. that is not brilliance..that is just being someone who watches too much TV. Have you ever noticed that I am ellipses crazy( CrayCrayKins), because I am. My grandfather is an English teacher, so when I speak to him on the phone, I get a running count of how many times I have said the word "like" inappropriately. Oh wells!

Who wants some links? I want to show you some links.

A clash of the scary..KKK rallies. Clowns use Mocking KKK. KKK acts like little bitches, gets arrested. Clowns Win! Mocking KKK is Super Effective!

Gross! Funny.. Possibly Illegal.. Funny! Gross o.O

Being someone who is allergic to grass, this is like being water-boarded.

I have a hard time thinking that this will have any validity.. this was an episode from 2008. IT IS ALMOST 2011!!! I became a fan of Samwell because of South Park. Parody is protected under the 1st amendment.

WOOT! Sexiest Man Alive! I am glad that it is him and not Justin Beiber.

Buy Me This!

Cat in box, boxy fox, fox with cox.. Oh, fuck it I can't rhyme anymore!

Good Mornin' Y'all.

I have a bunch of neato burrito stuff to shows you. 

This feline is blowin' up the internets with its unholy love of all things made of cardboard that has the ability to contain things. Maru!

In the grand tradition of Beautiful Behind
Womb Raider
Schindler's Fist
Shaving Ryan's Privates
Glad he ate her
Driving Into Miss Daisy
Riding Miss Daisy
Batman in Robin
Blowjob Impossible
Dyke Hard
Star Whores
Sorest Rump
Edward Penishands
Gangbangs of New York
On Golden Blonde
How Stella Got Her Tube Packed
In Diana Jones and the Temple Poon
Saturday Night Beaver
Sick Degrees of Penetration
Legally Boned
Throbin Hood (Prince of Beaves)
When Harry Ate Sally
Romancing The Bone
Lord Of The G-Strings
White Men Can't Hump
Ocean's 11 inches
American Booty
Pulp Friction
Swollow Hal
Spankenstein
Breast Side Story
Blown in 60 Seconds
Buffy The Vampire Layer
Buttman and Throbbin'
Rambone
Sperms of Enderarment
School of Cock
Free My Willy
Sperminator
Cums the next REALLY AWESOME PORNO BASED ON A MOVIE!!! PRON!

There is also, this little gem that is not a porno.. but probably could be if it really wanted to.. Red Riding Hood, it is looking to have some sexy sex in it. + Gary Oldman.. mmmmmmmm ( *** Update.. Nevermind it is like Twilight.. with only werewolves.. don't bother)

Newest Japanese Popstar... is a hologram. Much along the same technology that makes Gorillaz  possible to tour.  I have a group of homies.. who have agreed, that they are willing to pay up to 250$ USD to see this if it comes to town. SOO RADS!

Speaking of anime.. My friend Kitty is super rad.. and we usually have the same tastes in Anime.. she hipped me to Ouran High School Host Club.. however.. Really!? A Host Club.. in a highschool? If you don't know what that is.. you should read this helpful wiki.

Apparently, when male spiders of the wasp variety gittin' jiggy, they actually break it off into that bitch. Crazy yo! So they prefer virgin spiders to do that with because you don't want to break that shit off into another man's bitch.

I guess, I should just start telling people that I was raised in the way of most Amazonian children, which is.. if my parents are having sex with you.. then you are another parent.

Tetris may help cure PTSD.. however.. have you had a Tetris addiction? I have, it ain't pretty. First off, you play it in your dreams. Actually anytime your eyes are closed you see the tetras falling. Also, you can never hear any other music than 8-Bit classical. I KID YOU NOT!

I would like to also urge people to adopt an endangered word. 

That is all for now.

And now back to not being lazy and in relatively good health!

It is time for catching up on the internets. I have been occupied with life as of recent and so now.. I need to compensate but sitting on my fat ass for a couple of hours while I regurgitate things for you.

First item. Happy Veterans/Remembrance Day.

Here are some items I found earlier this week that I was going to post but instead wrote a long rant about people being raped. :(

I am tired of people who are not enlightened in the slightest, insisting that any bullying is ok, if it is to gay kids. They are douchebags for insisting that the recent campaigns against bullying are an evil plot to push the gay agenda. DIAF!

This kids parents should get a medal. I am all about teaching your child to fight for their free speech. I also get super annoyed when school have retarded dress codes.

I read this, cried and then pretty much made up my mind to buy a print next pay day.

I think most definitely think that parents who do not provide money for their kids to eat.. should have to pay for it by social shaming. However, it shouldn't be the tax payers burden.. I think that there should be a tattoo put on their heads that says, "I am a fucking douche canoe, that doesn't care enough about my children to provide them with food. Please mock and stone me."

Dear Texas... DIAF! Seriously please secede from the union.

I really want one of these. 

This is pretty amazing, great article on how and why jellyfish only sting what they want to sting.

BRILLIANT IDEA! However, I don't think however I can get away with doing this when I have larva.

What?! Lesbian families have a 0% child abuse rate!  " Duh, No shit!" Says, my husband.

This guy should be waterboarded until he dies, then revived, then waterboarded again till he dies again, then revived... and then asked if President Bush should get a medal.

MMMMMMMMMMM Nintendo Characters.. it's whats for dinner. Read this persons entire blog... NOW!

I also want you to buy me this! Or.. make it for me really.

A man lost 27 lbs. on the convenience store diet.. however he really doesn't recommend it.

Bob Marley is an all mellowing force to screaming asshole toddlers.

Whoopsies!

Don't forget kids, November 17th is National Unfriend People On Facebook Day!

Thanks For Eating Up Politicians Facebookers!

I would like to thank one and all who participated in the Dinosaurs Eating Politics Facebook Campaign.
I have learned some things, that will make next years a bunch better.. mainly! MARKETING! The people who said that they were going to attend but then didn't and then people who said that they might attend totally rock out so, hopefully next year. We will actually have more people participate.

Would you like to see some dinos?

This is a lovely drawing of Sarah Palin being gobbled up! By  Brian Decker

This lovely little number was done by Cass Smith

Clinton Kitkoski totally rocked it!

I am really like this one, done by Gwen Beaudry

This is one that I did. 

Dino being eaten a Dino. Kris Chayet

Dinosaurs don't eat ass! Kris Hedrick

Kristin Schmitt, you have done some really amazing work. 

Matt Kane, way to cut and paste! I love it!

Even my husband participated. 

Sue Watson, I really like your mastery of the stick figure :D

 So, here we have it. The participants did a great job. Super proud of you all.

I'm A Little Bit' Religious Articles And A Little Bit Of WTF!!!!!!

I like being super productive, it is nice. I had appointments today which is always lovely. I also had my fingers(prints) taken so that I could send them to Mulder and Scully, to prove that I could move to Canada. Neat huh?!
****** WARNING********
So, when I started writing this post today, I didn't intend for it to be a super downer. It just happened that way. I am also not trying to make it look that religion=rape. You have been warned.

I have a few interesting articles about religion that I found today. So here they are.

"God Bless America". An essay written by Rev. Candace Chellew-Hodge for Huffington Post. Is though provoking. She gets to the nitty-gritty about why it is so easily thrown about by politicians and how evangelicals are kind of ruining it for the rest of us.

Please forgive me. No, I don't want to forgive you. There was a study done on how Americans would like more forgiveness but are not quick forgive. "Americans express a near-universal desire for a more loving and unified world," said the "Survey of Love and Forgiveness in American Society," released on Oct. 28.

Here is a another case of people who do not believe in god, not being dickheads about it. I posted an article a few weeks back about how atheist can be part of interfaith discussions without turning into self-righteous douche bags who think that people who have "faith" are retards. Cool!

Kind of a bummer section ahead. Rape and Sexual Assault totally suck ass. However, here are a few WTF! moments having to do with it in the news... and then also an article about how Private Practice did a thoughtful respectful episode tackling the issue.

WTF is wrong with the 5th Circuit!? The situation is, " The former cheerleader and her family are appealing the ruling by the Fifth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in New Orleans, which includes an order to pay the school district’s legal fees on the grounds their suit was far-fetched and frivolous. [...]

H.S., then 16, attended a party in her hometown of Silsbee, Texas, in October 2008. She said she was dragged into a room, thrown onto the floor by several youths and raped by Rakheem Bolton, a star on the school’s football and basketball teams.

Bolton and a teammate were arrested two days later, but were allowed to return to school after a county grand jury declined to indict them. They were later indicted on sexual assault charges, but in the interim came the February 2009 incident on the basketball court.

H.S. joined in leading cheers for the Silsbee High team. But when Bolton went to the foul line, and the cheers included his name, she stepped back, folded her arms and sat down."

Situations like these are beyond fucked up.

I live in Seattle, so this kind of fucked up my day when the original incident happened. A lady crawled onto the roof of the courthouse and threatened suicide. Closed down a fair chunk of downtown because of it. However, given the circumstances, I could see why this lady wanted to die. She was in the middle of a trial where the man who allegedly raped her was representing himself. So she had the supreme displeasure of having to face her attacker while he questioned her. He thinks there should be a mistrial.. I think that if you are accused of a violent crime, you should never represent yourself.

Dear lord people! Stop having sex with kids! This is not ok. 23 child prostitutes, 99 pimps and 885 really fucked up humans have been found/arrested in the last 3 days. I am giving a big thumbs up for the FBI here.

So, with all of this. Let me talk about Private Practice. The link is a review of the show in question. When I watched the cliffhanger the week before.. a knot in my stomach formed. For a week.. I sat there staring at the calender kind of dreading Thursday. When Friday morning came around, I woke up, made a cup of tea, sat with cats and forced myself to watch it. I pretty much almost puked several times. This would be because I am a victim of sexual assault.. and well Charlotte King hurt me by not reporting it. I understand the "I don't want him to have anymore of me" mentality but for fuck sakes, he is going to do it again. Hopefully this week, she gets some sense and reports it, because if she doesn't I might have lost all respect for her as a person, even though she is a character on a show. It also, doesn't help that the rapist is Nicholas Brendan who played Xander Harris on Buffy. Who, as that character was all about putting the hurt on Spike when he tried to rape Buffy.

Gah! Now I am too damn depressed to finish with all of the links I found today. I will just have to save them for tomorrow. Be Safe.

Cancer Jellyfish, Soft Jeans, Snowflakes, Shrooms, Best Brides Mades Ever.

"Luminous cells from jellyfish can be used to diagnose cancers deep inside the body, scientists have said." Freaking Awesome!

Levi's is making their jeans eco-friendly! They are cutting back how they finish jeans and irrigate cotton. Kudos.

Snowflakes helping not so popular snowflakes, get more yearbooky.

Neat article about mushroom foraging, the big business of sending them to Japan because apparently they are sexy mushrooms and a dude that won't remove his hat.

Dude, totally jacks limo. Bridesmaids totally don't tell the bride till the wedding is over. Dude, gets caught. Everyone wins!

Tidbity

I would like to submit to you for your approval some odd tidbits of the moment.

Researchers are developing a way to fill your stomach with a polymer that acts like the stuff inside diapers so that you don't over eat! Odd thought. It also has the added benefit of cleansing your intestines of sugars and fats that are kickin' around that are just waiting to add to your fat ass. Cool! Kinda... can you imagine pooping that out?! >:(

Some really smart kid has figured out that if you write longer essays on your SAT, you score goes up. Then some other guy busted a nut because the kid kind of did his testing for his theory for him! Cool!

Do you remember the opening scene to the Charlie's Angels movie? You know.. where L.L Cool J wearing racist dress, was on an airplane, making a rendervouz with some other guy then goes all crazy grabs him, opens the door to the airplane and then jumps out, the racist garment turns into a parachute, then they land in a boat and he rips of his face to reveal Drew Barrymore?! Yea, this guy from Hong Kong... kinda did that to get int Canada as a refugee...

So, uh.. you know all of those quirky sayings we have like, "thorn in my side", 'skin of the teeth", "the writings on the wall" THEY ARE FROM THE BIBLE!!! Suck it, Atheists! That is probably the only good thing religion has done, but for every time I hear one of you say a phrase like that.. you are getting a look.

Sure wish I could talk.

More people need to learn alternative forms of communication. I am recovering from laryngitis and it sucks. I work in a talk intensive job. I live in a talk intensive house. I am a Talky McTalkerson.

Ways I think people should learn how to communicate are as follows. Semaphore, ASL,TTY, Morse Code, Interpretive Dance, Expressive Jazz Piano.

Stuff is happening. Lets see what!

Cthulu, Cthulu!




Thank god I don't have to worry about this plight..
"SINGLE, attractive women say too many men have a poor knowledge of comics, especially the Golden Age stuff and the DC crossover series." The article states that" Researchers found that 83% of women believe detailed comic and sci-fi knowledge is the most important attribute in a potential partner." It is also has gems of highly unlikely but very amazing quotes like this, "For me it's very much 'comics first, clitoris second', and I'm sure most women feel the same."

"Is there a way to convert to Judaism without having to have a circumcision? Like, you know how ladies want to wear earrings but don't want to pierce their ears?"


Have you ever wanted to see Back to the Future.. Bollywood style?

Well, thank Jesus.. Jesus is done! WORLDS LARGEST JESUS STATUE FINISHED! Now to start making the worlds largest Cthulu statue.

You can play the new Kinect.. NAKED! However, it will still take naked pictures of you so.. yea..

Coolest conjoined twins ever.

Oh, yea and if you are an anti-feminist.. you are apparently pro male and female equality. Feminists are man haters. Fyi.

Look at this.. woka woka woka

Buy me one of these.. I need a porcelain figuring of a horrible maimed lady.. STAT!

Judth Griggs is a supid retard moron.

I grew up in a house hold where you shared recipes with your friends and neighbors. Anytime, my mother got one of these recipes. She would write it down in her book. Some of the time she would make it and take a picture or take a picture of  what her friend brought over and put it in the book as well... one thing my mom ALWAYS DID!!! was say who she got it from. This would be because my mother has morals and ethics. My mother is obviously not Judith Griggs.

I am not going to act like I found anything myself. I am going to source where I found my information about this.. THE INTERWEBS!!! which if you didn't know.. is not NOT PUBLIC DOMAIN!

This is the plight of Monica Gaudio ( our interwebz heroine) her buddy Nick did a good job too! She has been told by Judith Griggs of Cooks Source magazine that she can steal stuff that Monica has written because a) she is a dumb bitch b) the internets is public domain c) Monica who went to the Columbia School of Journalism didn't teach her how to write a sentence, so it was totally cools that she "edited" her piece and put it up on her shitty internet food thinger. d) all of the above.

See, look! Actual snippet of the letter: "Yes Monica, I have been doing this for 3 decades, having been an editor at The Voice, Housitonic Home and Connecticut Woman Magazine. I do know about copyright laws. It was "my bad" indeed, and, as the magazine is put together in long sessions, tired eyes and minds somethings forget to do these things.
But honestly Monica, the web is considered "public domain" and you should be happy we just didn't "lift" your whole article and put someone else's name on it! It happens a lot, clearly more than you are aware of, especially on college campuses, and the workplace. If you took offence and are unhappy, I am sorry, but you as a professional should know that the article we used written by you was in very bad need of editing, and is much better now than was originally. Now it will work well for your portfolio. For that reason, I have a bit of a difficult time with your requests for monetary gain, albeit for such a fine (and very wealthy!) institution. We put some time into rewrites, you should compensate me! I never charge young writers for advice or rewriting poorly written pieces, and have many who write for me... ALWAYS for free!"

Well, Judith you are a cow. moo.

And then of course our Mistress Of The Internets, set forth her minions. The meanest, cruelest, evil, tasteless vile group of humans know to mankind. ( I should know.. I am one of them) /B/Tards. Oh yes, this bitch gets 4chan/d. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Facebook Page of the shitty magazine, PWND!

BoingBoing got a hold of it.

The internets want their pound of flesh and they wants it now! 

Also, this is a very excellently written article complete with sourcing and an interview with Monica. 

Dump Dump Dump

Boing Boing Dump!

Horrific video of men being burnt by invisible flames.  This is because of methanol used as fuel. It is clear burning.

Apparently, on 10/25 there was an EPIC OMGWTFBBQ hail storm in Georgia.

I agree with Maggie Koerth-Baker, I also welcome our new female jesus snake overlords.

This is what I am talking about! When you do a Halloween costume.. your shit better be immaculate, amazing and totally worth an entire paycheck!

VD is for Everyone!

Non Boing Boing Dump.

Twiggy in an odd comercial for a department store. Music is the BeeGees, Dancing is from well.. you will see.

The pervy pervert little brother of the Sultan of Brunei has "sex trophies" that he doesn't want to admitted into evidence for a real estate case. !!! I WANT TO HAVE 'SEX TROPHIES"

WTF is wrong with people. You don't bite OTHER PEOPLES CHILDREN! unless they give you
permission.

"Three area residents were indicted Wednesday after they were accused of using a woman's bacterial infection to rob a Cleveland convenience store." See, when I read this. I think, uh.. how is this woman using her vaginosis  to rob a gas station???!! But I guess she has MRSA so that is a different beast.

Dear people who play hockey.. DON'T LEAVE YOUR SHIT LYING AROUND! You will have it blown up.... with footage!

Bitchy Cat Hijacks Train!

When I was young, I went as Indiana Jones for Halloween.. so I don't understand why..oh wait they are dumb bitches.. ok.

George Takei is a fucking genius. Clint McCance is a Fucking Douchebag.

Ok, off to work.

So, I started a Facebook Campaign.

I started a Facebook Campaign  It is called Dinosaurs Eat Politics. I want people to draw pictures of dinosaurs eating politicians, political movements, government buildings, stupid laws Tea Party Members.

It is important to do so because everyone whines about how " politics in this country is bullshit". It is bullshit in every country. I think that whining is annoying, unless I am sick. Then it is only ok for me to whine.

We live in a world today where people feel disenfranchised about where they live, how their elected officials act and how their morals and ethics are turned into stupid laws.

When I am frustrated about shit, I draw it being eaten by a dinosaur. It helps.

See.. I do this all the time!! ALL OF THE TIMES!!!

I was busy dieing of consumption.

Hello Kids,
Miss me? I know, I missed you too. I am totally fucking ill. It is not pretty. However, I think that I have found the magic concoction of over the counter medications to trick me into feeling "better". I am however, enjoying sleeping for most of the day. I do not however, enjoy the smell of ketone breakdown in my body. It makes me feel gross and smell sickly sweet smelling.

My Halloween was boring. I "fought crime" and then went home and passed out.

Things happened, lets see what I missed. First off, VOTE!! VOTE NOW!! GO VOTE!! HAVE YOU VOTED YET? NO? YOU SUCK! GO VOTE!

Why didn't this shit happen earlier so that I didn't have to mix pharmaceuticals. Also, why aren't my ninja proteins working fucking faster!

Interesting article about the concept of romanticism in teenagers leading to them participating in "benevolent" sexism. I feel conflicted about this.

Cough medicine makes think that this video is cool.

Cough medicine makes me dream of giant bugs.

VIDEO GAMES SHOULD BE AFFORDED THE SAME PROTECTIONS AS ART, LITERATURE, FILM AND DOUCHE BAGS LIKE GLENN BECK!!

Hey Facebookers, who love Final Fantasy and Mafia Wars.. Would you like some crack on top of your crack flavored crack?

Coolest kid ever!

More proof that Catholics would rather be child molesters than gay. ( retarded!)

Sasquatch lives in North Carolina? Really? I thought that he lived here. hmmmmmmmm

So, I want this cookbook.. buy it for me.

Interesting idea for a shelf, I am tempted to try it out when I own a place. However, I know that when I have larva they will poke their eyes out. Or Peter might.

Did you know that the "Time at the tone" lady was a real lady! She even had allergies and stuff.